Literally, let them use it for nesting.

Let me start off by saying, to each his own. One thing that is very important to know about me, is that I am a very type B "meh" kind of person.  You do what you want, I do what I want, and I'll keep my opinions to myself. Life is MUCH better this way, I tell you what.
Let me also say, that most of my issues with Baby Wise have to do with the timing.  I unequivocally without a doubt think that it is foolhardy to attempt "sleep training" any earlier than 3 months.  I know, I know, oh how I know, that this is not the convention, but I had to put it out there.  Baby Wise would probably be great for a 3-4 month old, just a little harder at 6 weeks.

At any rate, I do have my opinions on co-sleeping and bed sharing that are pretty much not shared by any one I know IRL. Everyone I know puts their baby to bed, in their own room, and like, watches them on tv or something, while the squirm and sometimes cry, until they fall asleep.

Is this deadly?
Are these parents neglectful?
Will these children be unfeeling sociopaths?
I'm sure the answer is without a doubt NO.
BUT, I know whats best for my children, and this model wasn't it.

I read baby wise while pregnant with #1.  It touted how unselfish, self-sufficient, and altruistic children were whose parents followed the advice outlined in between those book covers. Ah, how wonderful it is to know that your child will understand limits, and take correction readily because you put them on a schedule, and had them adhere to it. And woe, woe I say, unto the child that had parents that did not love them enough to spend the time to train them up on a schedule.  Those poor, ill managed children; destined for the penitentiary, and a life full of self-centeredness, an inability to follow directions, and a complete drain on society.

I ate it up.

Just like I ate up hypnobirthing.  And just like how hypnobirthing lasted around 20 minutes, Baby Wise was a quick, and distant memory. They placed that squishy, helpless baby girl in my arms, and I knew at that moment, she would have to get what she needed, whatever it took. Up at 3 am? Sure. Give her all the blood in my body? Ok.  If she needed it, she was going to get it. And there in lies my critique of the Baby Wise method.

If my baby needs to be rocked to sleep every night, why not? If she needs to be able to reach out her little hand and feel that someone is next to her, or hear our breathing (read snoring) throughout the night, why not? Why is it important for her to sleep through the night at 6 weeks? Which, by the way, while some babies manage it, I believe by in large, it is absolutely unreasonable to expect this. Ugh, I know, I know, you're baby was sleeping through the night the first day, and you love all the rest you got to get, and blah blee blah blee blah.  I get it!

Moving on, regarding co sleeping, in my honest, unprofessional, slightly unsupported opinion, it is a MUST for the first few weeks. There's all kinds of sciency stuff that claims that babies thrive better when they are able to hear mom and dad's breathing patterns, and sense that they are not alone. Nursery's at hospitals are empty now because Dr's have observed the drop in blood glucose, increase in stress, and drop in body temperatures that infants suffer when pulled away from mom, so they "encourage" you to room in. (I guess gone are the days of "nurse take this baby it's driving me nuts"). I think that most of what science says on mother-baby relations is a load of bologna, but some folks think scientists make the world go round, so perhaps it will help me prove my point.

 Regardless of science, there are a few, very common sense reasons, to have baby room in with you.

1. You can hear them

         Chief complaint of every new mom: baby's breathing is keeping me awake. THAT'S GOOD! There's this new thing called SIDS, which is caused by ???, and seems to be marked by an infant that stops breathing. Having baby in the room with you allows you to have a closer and more receptive ear to whats going on with baby's breathing.

2. Middle of the night nursing just got easier

         Hate having to get up and nurse baby alllllll the way across the house? No biggie, just reach over and grab baby to feed. This is a great reason to co-sleep and an even better reason to bed share.  By having baby in the room, you will hear hunger cues before its all out cry fest.  By bed sharing, you can nurse in your sleep, continue to get good rest, and not fear falling asleep somewhere compromising to baby, like a couch or glider. Nursing while in a comfy glider, can lead to mom falling back asleep; if nursing in a side hold, baby can slip down in between mom and chair, compromising baby's ability to breath. I've only heard of this happening once, and I'm no fear monger so don't take it as that, but when breastfeeding, bed sharing is one of the safest ways to feed while sleepy.  But don't take my word for it. Google it sometime, or check out this article by a real life bonafide doctor.

3. I'm scared of video monitors

        So I'm completely convinced I will see a ghost on one. I am absolutely NOT joking. I am terrified of looking at a tv screen and seeing something wondering around the baby's room.  I am equally freaked out by audio monitors. I would never sleep again if I heard some voice coming across, regardless of whether it was from the great unknown, or the house next door.

4. Its safer for all kinds of fear monger reasons

         Fire?  Flash flood? Earthquake? Hurricane? Home invasion?  All reasons to have a child that is incapable of escaping, or getting to you in order to escape, in the same room.  Its much easier to grab baby and go, then to have to go get baby and go. And ohemgee, I can't imagine if you lived in a big or two story home, and baby was on a different floor/in a different wing. No no, at night time, and pretty much all day, keep baby close.

5. You will have sex again, I promise

        I have two children, so I speak from experience.  Besides, you're not supposed to  be shoving anything in there for the first six weeks anyway. Funny how the time it takes for you to recover, is the exact time it takes for baby to finish out that "Fourth Trimester". Any way, don't go trying to get bizzy just yet.  Stay at 3rd base for awhile, and tend to your new baby during this very fleeting time. If you've not had any children, I'm sure the idea of getting in on with baby in the room sounds gross, strange, possibly perverted.  Check back in after 4-5 months and let me know what you think then. HA! I *personally* would not have relations with baby IN BED with me, but I know lots of folks do.  Say, why don't you go ask your parents what they did? Just kidding, GROSS!


There are two sides to this coin, too lazy to care for baby on demand, so place them on a schedule that suits you, OR, too lazy to take the time it takes to schedule baby, and have them adhere to it, so do whatever the baby wants. Either thought process is a very watered down, and extreme view on the subject. Its not that easy. Parenting is not easy.